Biofeedback Day 3 and 4

Hey friends, hope everyone is having a great week. I need to do a little bit of a catching up with my biofeedback sessions, so here we go. I just went to my fifth session. Nothing really to report from previous weeks. Still the same. Yeah. That can be pretty depressing, and I will be honest, here recently I broke down and told my wife I didn’t think my brain was going to recover. I let all the fear and doubts creep in along with all the information I read online about cases similar to mine.

However, small victories are important. Even if it is the smallest of victories. Which I did have one! I had a dream that I could actually remember. I was told by my clinical psychologist that is a small victory. It only happened once, but I will take it. We don’t need to go into the details of the dream, but just the fact I had one that I remember is a good sign.

To those in recovery, or dealing with a life long illness, I am with you. We all want instant gratification. We want change to happen today. Unfortunately, change usually doesn’t happen overnight; It takes time. Some of us will have to fight this fight for the rest of our lives, so I am here to say I am with you. I feel your pain, I share your cries. I am battling with you against your struggles.

We won’t lose hope. We may fall down, but we will get back up. That is the most important thing I tell myself everyday now. It is okay not to be okay, but the sun will rise again. It is another chance for us to move forward. To tell our mental health illnesses or any other illnesses that we are dealing with that we won’t let that define us. We are stronger than our struggles.

That is a hard mindset to have every day in every moment especially when life slaps you in the face, or you feel like you are in a stalemate.

That is why we write. That is why we stick together. The world needs more love, more kindness, more community.

So…I will not give up. I will follow through with these biofeedback sessions. I will trust the process. I will give it everything I have, especially on the days I want to give in to my doubt and throw in the towel.

Sometimes we just have to live a life in the trenches, and that is okay.

I am with you.